Grieving

All posts in the Grieving category

Being Vunerable

Published May 4, 2018 by birdieklh

Venerability . . . oh, how we fight against being vulnerable with one another . . . why?!

carnival-venice-eyes-mask-53207.jpeg I used to hide behind masks myself – believe me – I had a mask for almost every situation! “never let anyone know what I was really feeling”, that was my way of approaching life . . . yes, even as a Christian, even in Ministry! I would be sharing with others about the Love of Christ and living in victory, but be torn apart inside . . . never letting others know what was REALLY going on in my own shattered world! NOT ANY MORE!!!!  The Lord has shown me that there is a reason His Word tells us to “bear one another’s burdens”! Galatians 6:2

How can we truly be healed, if we do not allow others to minister to our wounds?!

How can we grow, if we do not allow the weeds to be pulled, the branches to be pruned and the roots to be fed and watered?!

I ask again . . . why?! Now, I answer . . . PRIDE, plain and simple . . . one of satan’s nasty tools that he loves to use to keep us from reaching our potential as becoming the beautiful whole sanctified Bride of Christ . . . (lust of the eyes, lust of the flesh and the pride of life; 1 John 2:16), his tricks never change! But why are we so quick to fall for his silly little dangling carrots in front of us?! For years I did, but NO MORE!!! I now make the conscious effort to choose to be vulnerable – to be open, even IF people make their own choice to think differently of me – that is their problem. I will forgive them.

So, here I am, with NO mask, sharing my heart . . . things have been REALLY chaotic to say the least, for a while now . . . took care of one side of it . . . now more ‘stuff’ has come up, and WOW! Mercy, I’m listening to a song just now that is talking about ‘the bottom falling out’ – how appropriate – BUT GOD! He has it ALL in His Hands! It is the trusting in Him through it that causes me to remind myself to “Breathe, girl!” (honestly, I do forget sometimes, and have to remind myself when I find myself really lightheaded!)  And I look at those I love, and sometimes find my thoughts going “who IS this person? why are they talking this way? what is going on? where is all this coming from?” Of course, I KNOW we do NOT wrestle against flesh but against principalities and powers . . . etc. Ephesians 6:12  and that I just have to crawl up on Abba Father’s lap and rest in Him, drawing upon Holy Spirit’s never ending PEACE that passes ALL understanding and press on ahead . . . but, being REAL here . . . the spirit is willing, the flesh is weak (sometimes)…. remember, I’ve left the masks behind!

I am choosing to press ahead . . . for God does NOT lie and His Word promises that He is Faithful to complete that which He started!!!! Philippians 1:6

Masks down, head bowed, on my knees, tears gently falling, heart shaking, asking for brothers and sisters to surround with loving prayers and arms of love; words of encouragement . . . words of corrections, if you see anything that needs correcting, I am open – I do NOT want anything to hinder my growth! I desire to remain a handmaiden that He can use for His glory, for the furthering of His Kingdom . . . nothing else! I never want to be a stumbling block to anyone in any way! Not ever, especially not in my vulnerability, but I refuse to wear masks ever again . . . I must continue to allow my Precious Lord to mold and shape me into ALL that He desires me to be! I long to be the spotless Bride that He longs to return for! I want no blemishes, no wrinkles, no scars!!! If there be ANY thing that is NOT right – I want it GONE!!!! Oh, Jesus, You alone know the depths of anguish within my being . . . I feel as though somehow I have failed you, but I am not responsible for those around me, we are each responsible for our own walk . . . help me to remain steadfast and true to you and to them through every step of this journey . . . in love and honor and respect.

I love how you just answered me, Lord . . . WOW!

“It’s all yours. All your life, no one will be able to hold out against you. In the same way I was with Moses, I’ll be with you. I won’t give up on you; I won’t leave you. Strength! Courage! You are going to lead this people to inherit the land that I promised to give their ancestors. Give it everything you have, heart and soul. Make sure you carry out The Revelation that Moses commanded you, every bit of it. Don’t get off track, either left or right, so as to make sure you get to where you’re going. And don’t for a minute let this Book of The Revelation be out of mind. Ponder and meditate on it day and night, making sure you practice everything written in it. Then you’ll get where you’re going; then you’ll succeed. Haven’t I commanded you? Strength! Courage! Don’t be timid; don’t get discouraged. God, your God, is with you every step you take.” Joshua 1:7-9 The Message

Now THAT sets me to rejoicing!!!!! 

worship in dance

image from oslchurch.com

© klh 4-Given Ministries

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Grieving Together

Published November 6, 2017 by birdieklh

We find ourselves the nation on our knees today after yesterday‘s horrible shooting in Sutherland Texas. It is a small town not too far from where I live. I don’t know anyone from that church but they are still my brothers and sisters. I do however know many who have gone down there to minister to those who are affected by this disaster, this tragedy, this horrific thing that should not of happened. Our heart aches, our tears flow freely yet there’s a part of us that knows beyond any shadow of any doubt that these precious ones who went from praising the Lord in their church home to praising Jesus in Person in their heavenly home with their Heavenly Father! Yes, that that does bring some comfort to our souls, yet the more mourning process is still heavy on our hearts. Yes Christians do grieve, Christian still mourn, Christian still cry. Remember, even our Lord Jesus Christ mourned and wept at the graveside of his dear friend Lazarus …

We drop to our knees, allow our tears to flow, ur hearts to cry out our anguish before the Throne, then we get up and be one His arms extended. We become His voice of love, speaking words of Hope and comfort and compassion. We start to help rebuild one moment, one step, one hug at a time. Through His LOVE. 

WE…the body of Christ need to act with one heart, linking arms together….we are planning on bringing down Thanksgiving meals to the community, continued prayer and counseling….please join with us in praying for their faith to remain unshattered and for their healing to be quick; for the Lord to somehow turn this tragedy around into a glorious triumph for His Glory and the good of this precious tight-knit community. 

Grieving Together

Published November 6, 2017 by birdieklh

We find ourselves the nation on our knees today after yesterday‘s horrible shooting in Sutherland Texas. It is a small town not too far from where I live. I don’t know anyone from that church but they are still my brothers and sisters. I do however know many who have gone down there to minister to those who are affected by this disaster, this tragedy, this horrific thing that should not of happened. Our heart aches, our tears flow freely yet there’s a part of us that knows beyond any shadow of any doubt that these precious ones who went from praising the Lord in their church home to praising Jesus in Person in their heavenly home with their Heavenly Father! Yes, that that does bring some comfort to our souls, yet the more mourning process is still heavy on our hearts. Yes Christians do grieve, Christian still mourn, Christian still cry. Remember, even our Lord Jesus Christ mourned and wept at the graveside of his dear friend Lazarus …

We drop to our knees, allow our tears to flow, ur hearts to cry out our anguish before the Throne, then we get up and be one His arms extended. We become His voice of love, speaking words of Hope and comfort and compassion. We start to help rebuild one moment, one step, one hug at a time. Through His LOVE. 

WE…the body of Christ need to act with one heart, linking arms together….we are planning on bringing down Thanksgiving meals to the community, continued prayer and counseling….please join with us in praying for their faith to remain unshattered and for their healing to be quick; for the Lord to somehow turn this tragedy around into a glorious triumph for His Glory and the good of this precious tight-knit community. 

Moments in Time

Published February 15, 2017 by birdieklh

Sometimes we seem to reflect upon certain moments in our life that we can quickly find ourselves ‘trapped’ in that time!

As much as we desire to get on with our lives, there always seems to be something way back in the past that has such a hold on us that we cannot seem to free ourselves and move on.

I truly believe that most of the time we are not even aware of those moments that have had enormous effects on the way we ‘see’ ourselves, and/or that can actually trigger responses in us as we face things that are in front of us now.

Are YOU trapped in a moment?

Do you find yourself responding to people or situations in a way that you find yourself questioning, Why in the world did that hit me the way it did?” or “Why did I respond that way?” or “Where in the world did that feeling come from?!”

Dear ones, when we have had trauma in our lives (even as far back as early childhood) and it has not truly been dealt with, it can – and does – trigger responses and reactions. Sometimes we’ve stuffed our experiences down so deeply inside that we don’t even recall them ourselves, yet something comes up and the trigger response is blown out of proportion!

If I find myself reacting to certain things, I have learned to ask the Lord to reveal to me the source within me that is allowing those words/thoughts/feelings to surface. Then, when He does, I repent (if its something I’ve caused) and ask Him to remove the hurt, allowing Him to bring forth the healing I need from that particular situation. Sometime it takes our reaching out to others as well, for added guidance – I strongly suggest a good Biblical counselor/mentor. To KNOW that the Lord desires us to walk in complete freedom from our past is a good place to start! Then, as you allow Holy Spirit to do His work in your heart, don’t allow the evil one to bring it back! If you find yourself starting to think about what someone said or did . . . stop it immediately . . . take that thought captive (2 Corinthians 10:5)! Then, change your focus (Isaiah 43:18 & Philippians 4:8)!

Another thing that really helps me accomplish this task is to declare God’s word (usually the opposite of what I’m thinking/feeling). Here are some examples:

1 – I “feel” SO unloved . . . I will focus on God’s love for me!

2 – I “feel” like I’m unaccepted or rejected . . . I will focus on the fact that God chose me!

3 – When my body is throwing symptoms of an illness . . . I focus on what Christ did already for my healing!

There are many, many scriptures that can change our heart/mind attitude, if we but ask Him to show us, He is faithful. Treasure what He speaks into your heart – dwell in His presence, communicating with Him every little detail – allow His complete and total healing to pour over every area of your life. We all need healing in one area or another (or some of us in MANY areas) . . . He is waiting for you to come to Him . . . He is ready to love you through to victory!

© klh 4-Given Ministries

 

Wasn’t it Just Yesterday?

Published September 9, 2016 by birdieklh

When our world turned upside down?

When all of our smiles and hopes

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Image from Steve McCurry, pintrest

Turned into tears and frowns?

Wasn’t it just yesterday

When we watched those towers fall

In shock, despair and unbelief

Our prayers to God did call

Oh, Father of all creation,

What has happened to our nation?

Wasn’t it just yesterday

That tragedy struck our hearts

Words, thoughts, speculation

Thrown around like fiery darts?

We had revival for a short time

As people turned to You

For most, in their darkest hour

Sought YOU to see them through.

For those of us who KNOW You,

Always had that inner peace

Those who just for a time

Sought You for ‘release’ . . .

Yet, many, quite sadly

Too soon turned away

Back to the lives they knew

Allowing the world, their thoughts to sway.

Father, God, YOU alone are the answer to ALL we face

I seek You NOW with all my heart, asking for You for Grace . . .

To renew our faith . . . as we humble ourselves and pray . . .

As we truly run after You,

I KNOW that You are Faithful, Righteous and True.

In You there is healing, in You there is Hope

As we remember, and trust in You,

Lord, You help us to cope

With all the pain of those memories dear

That happened to us back in that year . . . 15 years ago . . .

Oh Lord, I pray, Your great mercy . . . show

Let people see their need of You

Let Your love begin to flow

Reunite Your body, Lord, and for this nation, may we pray

More earnestly, consistently,

And LISTEN to what You say –

For ONLY in You will there be Hope and Peace

….You set us free!

©klh 4-Given Ministries

 

 

 

Overwhelmed by Grace

Published August 1, 2016 by birdieklh

This song TRULY expresses my own heart these days . . . If you’ve been following my other blog (Daring to Make a Difference) you already are aware of the fact that recently the Lord has given me a huge push (kick in the pants) to step out and start sharing publicly a deep dark secret I’ve held for 43 years and 5 month now. . .I fought Him, like I’m known to do from time to time when He wants me out of my ‘comfort zone’, but as He lovingly continues to prompt me, I relent; I surrender; I submit and start going forth with that which He is leading me to do.

It is NOT an easy thing to do after that many years of secrecy to start sharing with a few people, let alone with the world, but I know (from past experience) that as I do step out in obedience to His call, His GRACE IS there all the way, and that glorious grace is overwhelming!

So, casting down every vain imagination, (2 Corinthians 10:5); resting in Him FULLY (Psalm 91); trusting in Him (Proverbs 3:5-6), I put one foot in front of the other and began this new phase of my journey.

I KNOW beyond any shadow of any doubt that He always provides everything that is needed when you are in the center of His will. Even when we do not see, cannot even begin to imagine where the path will eventually lead, even when the enemy tries to throw doubts and lies your way that you are ‘not up to the task’!  I CHOOSE to be obedient to His call. (see 1 Samuel 3)!


And, now, as I have walked through several doors of opportunity – sharing my story – the GRACE, the LOVE, the response of others has been incredible. The words He is having me speak are truly helping to reach out to the hearts and lives of others for their own healing and it is overwhelming.

There is a local radio station here in San Antonio, KDRY 1100 AM that airs a segment every Sunday afternoon at 2:30 pm called  “Urban Missionaries”. I will be sharing my own personal journey as well as the legal aspects of the issues and what is being done to educate people in this matter AND numerous areas of resources to help others who have (or are) experiencing the same as I – hiding a deep dark secret. You see, as we hide things deep inside, they grow/fester and cause all kinds of side effects that we do not even think have anything to do with it – I sure didn’t!

Another thing I have done is create a special page on our website with resource links and testimonies. My own journey will be posted soon as well, and I am praying for the funds to upgrade the website so that I can actually post the audio from the various broadcasts that I’m doing.

I pray that as you face whatever you find yourself facing today – whether current issues or something that is haunting you from your own past – that you can realize, accept and KNOW that His GRACE IS SUFFICIENT . . . in fact it is absolutely overwhelming (in the best possible way)!

©klh 4-Given Ministries

SO Much . . .

Published July 11, 2016 by birdieklh

So much anger.

So much pain.

So much grief, Lord,

Help me to remain

At peace with others, and walk in love

Your Perfect Love, sent from Heaven above.

Show me how to help them release

Their frustrations, their angst,

And grab a hold of  Your Peace!

It is only through You that we can find rest

In this land of turmoil and strife

Let us learn to walk in LOVE with others

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image from incolors.club

As we face each day of life, for

Until Your return when all strife

Will CEASE . . . we can walk with Your Spirit

In Your PERFECT Peace –

Peace with You, by accepting Your Son

Peace with each other, Lord, make us ONE!

We need Your love,

Your grace,

Your peace,

Your wisdom, direction,

Lord, let it increase

Within our hearts and teach us to PRAY –

Pray with passion, with ferver, with tears

Over this Nation, once great, now filled with fears.

Let us use our voices before Your Throne

As well as speaking out here and now

To make Your Truth known!

The answer is YOU – for You are LOVE –

But we’ve neglected to show it

Oh, Father, forgive . . .

May we rise up and THROUGH YOU – LIVE!!!


Dear ones, we have wasted so much time NOT being on our knees before God on behalf of our Nation – our World! We have wasted so much time focusing on the things around us and allowing the enemy of our souls to dim our view of the VICTORY that is already ours through Christ’s finished work on Calvary!

We have forgotten who we are in Him and Who He IS in us!

We have forgotten to share the Hope we have – in fact, we have actually begun to speak gloom and doom along with the world around us!

SHAME ON US!!!

The time is NOW – Christian – ARISE! Wake-up! Speak out (in love) God’s principles! Take a stand (in love). We can be BOLD in our faith as long as we temper it with God’s Love remember it is His Kindness that leads to repentence!  Romans 2:4

 

 

The Precious Blood of Jesus was shed for EVERYONE! 

 

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